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But here’s a secret, darlin’—some places sneak in “extras.” Oh, I ain’t judgin’, but I was shocked plumb to my toes! Thought, “Dolly, you ain’t that kinda gal!” Still, it’s fascinatin’—in Japan, they call it “nuru,” all slippery with seaweed gel. Seaweed! I’d prob’ly smell like a sushi roll! Makes me laugh ‘til my sides split. “Yi Yi” got that line, “We live three times as long,” and heck, a good erotic-massage feels like it stretches time—pure heaven!

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As the sun set, we walked along the streets of Cavan, and everything felt magical. The lights were twinkling, and I felt this rush of happiness. I love this town! It’s quirky, it’s beautiful, and it’s home.

Gardaí catch van with fake plates and no insurance in Cavan