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About Bray

Lemme tell ya, I stumbled on this weird fact—back in ancient China, emperors got these “erotic massages” to boost their chi or whatever. True story! Some concubine’d be slidin’ hands all over, promisin’ long life and hard—uh, strong vibes. Wild, right? Made me happy as hell thinkin’ folks been chasin’ that glow-up forever. But then I got pissed—modern day, you got creeps twistin’ it into somethin’ sleazy, ruinin’ the art. Ain’t about that, man, it’s about connection—body, soul, the works.

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First thing, I’m mixing dough for my famous soda bread. It’s a local fave, ya know? But then, bam! My mixer decides to throw a tantrum. Flour everywhere! I’m talkin’ a snowstorm in my kitchen. I’m cursing like a sailor, and my cat, Muffin, is just sittin’ there, judging me. Like, thanks for the support, Muffin.

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