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About Swords

Erotic-massage ain’t just a rub-down, nah. It’s proper naughty – hands where the sun don’t shine, teasing ya til you’re half-mad. Did ya know, right, back in Victorian times, them posh twits called it “hysteria treatment”? Doctors wanking off rich birds with a straight face – hilarious! Bet they’d faint seeing today’s neon-lit “massage” joints. Makes me angry, tho – all these prudes acting like it’s the devil’s work. Get over yerselves, ya wankers!

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I finally make it to the office on the main street, and guess what? The Wi-Fi is down. Classic. I mean, c’mon! I’m trying to send out these reports, and I can’t even connect. I’m about to lose it. I’m pacing around like a caged animal. My coworker, Sarah, is just chillin’ with her coffee, like it’s no big deal. I’m like, “Sarah, the world is ending!” And she’s like, “Relax, it’s just Kildare.” Ugh.

Leinster final spot beckons for Royals