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So, I knew this chick, right, did escortin’ back in ’98 – true story, swear it. She’d meet these suits, all high-and-mighty, in some dingy hotel off the M25. One dude, fat as a hog, tipped her with a *gold chain* – not cash, a friggin’ chain! She was pissed, threw it at him, stormed out – hilarious, mate. Made me laugh ‘til I choked. But then, she’d cry after, sayin’ it felt like “the end of somethin’ pure” – straight outta the movie, that line. Got me thinkin’, escort’s a grind, not just a quick shag.

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Also, I gotta mention my fave thing: the quirky little bridge on Drinan Creek – it's all rickety like an old joke and makes funny creaky sounds as I skip near it sometimes. I remember my buddy asking, "Hey, is mayonnaise an instrument?" right as I stepped off the bridge, lol! That day, I felt, like, super happy and sorta surprised by my own silliness.

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