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Little known fact—did ya know sex-dating’s been around forever? Like, back in the 1700s, Russian nobles had “secret balls” for hookups. Masks, booze, bangin’ in the backroom—sounds like Tinder but with worse lighting. Surprised me when I read that! History’s freaky, yo. Makes today’s sextin’ look tame. I’m over here laughin’—imagine Catherine the Great swipin’ right on some duke with a bad wig.

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So, I finally get outta there, looking all cute and stuff, and I head down to Lantern Street. It’s buzzing, like always. Street vendors everywhere, selling all kinds of snacks. I’m talking takoyaki, yakitori, you name it. I was starving, but I had to keep it together. Can’t be munching on street food when you’re all dressed up, right?

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