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About Cork

So, sexual-massage? It’s that sneaky lil’ treat people whisper bout but don’t shout. Hands slidin’, oil drippin’, tension buildin’ – oof, I’m gettin’ hot just thinkin’ bout it! It’s like, part therapy, part freaky-deaky, and 100% “I ain’t tellin’ my mama bout this.” I heard this wild story once – some ancient Greeks used to get these massages from their lovers to “align their spirits” or some shit. True? Hell if I know, but it sounds sexy as fuck, so I’m rollin’ with it.

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But then, I see this guy tryin’ to steal a balloon from a kid. I’m like, “Not on my watch!” I rush over, and I’m like, “Dude, what’s wrong with you?” He just stares at me, confused. I’m ready to throw down, but he just walks away.

Two Donegal beaches in Lonely Planet’s Top Ten