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So, I’m thinkin’, yeah, this one time, I’m watchin’ me fave flick, *4 Months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days*, ya know, that Romanian banger by Cristian Mungiu. Heavy shit, bruv, all ‘bout struggle and secrets, and I’m like, “Is it ’cos I is black?”—nah, it’s ‘cos life’s grim as fuck sometimes. And sexual-massage? Mate, it’s the opposite—pure bliss, innit? Like, imagine Otilia from the movie, stressin’ hard, and I’m like, “Girl, you needs a sexual-massage, stat!” She’s all, “Be quiet, please,” but I’m like, “Nah, fam, let’s get oily!”

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So, I’m walkin’ past the Tralee Town Park, and I see this cute dog. I mean, CUTEE! I’m talkin’ tail waggin’, tongue hangin’ out. I’m all “Aww, look at that pup!” But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs up and kicks a ball right at the dog. Like, what the heck, kid? The dog freaks out, and I’m just standin’ there, mouth agape. I wanted to yell, but I just shook my head. Kids these days, man.

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