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Alright, mate, lemme tell ya bout prostitutes—wild gig, right? Been thinkin bout this since watchin *Pan’s Labyrinth*. That flick’s my jam—dark, twisted, Guillermo’s a freakin genius. So, imagine this: a prostitute, grindin it out, real world’s her labyrinth. “The pale man” ain’t some monster tho—it’s the johns, the pimps, the system, all eyeless and grabby. Freaky, huh?

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First off, I hit up the local café on O’Connor Square. You know, the one with the best scones? Yeah, that one. I ordered my usual—coffee and a scone. But guess what? They were outta scones! Like, how do you run outta scones in Tullamore? I was fuming. I mean, c’mon! It’s like running outta Guinness in Dublin. Just wrong, ya know?

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