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I get pissed, ya, when I hear pimps messin’ wit ‘em! Makes me wanna go Terminator on ‘em—BAM! “I’ll be back” to crush dose scumbags! Dey’re strong, dese ladies, stronger den me liftin’ 300 pounds, I swear. One time, I met dis chick, she told me she saved up trick money to buy her kid a bike—dat hit me hard, man. Happy tears, ya, I was like, “You’re da real champ!” She was all shy, but I could see dat fire in her.

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But then, BAM! My computer crashes. Just like that. I’m staring at the screen like it’s possessed. I’m sweating bullets, thinking, “Great, just great. This is how I go down in history.” I had to reboot it, and while I’m waiting, I’m pacing around like a caged animal. My lab mates are giving me weird looks. I’m like, “What? You’ve never seen a biochemist lose their mind before?”

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