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“What have you got inside you?”—another *Ida* zinger. Escort’s got no soul, I’ll tell ya that! Basic engine, 1.6-liter, wheezin’ like an old man. Gas mileage? Eh, 30 MPG tops—nothin’ to write home about. But it’s practical, gets ya from A to B, no frills, no bullshit. I’m sittin’ here thinkin’, who’d invest in this relic? Collectors, maybe—some nutjob in Nebraska’s probly hoardin’ five of ‘em! Me? I’d rather sink cash into Tesla, but that’s just ol’ Larry dreamin’ big.

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After the park, we head back home, and I’m feeling pretty good. Like, I survived! But then, we get to the house, and the parents are home early. Surprise! They walk in, and I’m like, “Hey, everything’s cool!” But I’m covered in chocolate smudges, and Amir has grass stains all over his pants. The parents just look at me like, “What happened?” I’m like, “Uh, we had a little adventure.”

‘You make life worth living’ – Read DJ Tira’s touching birthday wish for Gugu Khathi