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About Bnei Brak

Alright, mate, so I’m a dental tech, right? Dr. Evil style – pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars.” – sittin’ here thinkin’ bout erotic-massage. Ya know, not my usual gig, fixin’ teeth and all, but damn, this topic’s got some juice! I mean, who’d think rubbin’ someone down could get so fancy? Saw this chick once gettin’ an erotic-massage – not creepy, just research, swear – and the vibes? Straight outta *The Return*, that moody Andrey Zvyagintsev flick I love. “The sea’s breathing, alive,” like that – heavy, intense, ya feel me?

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So, I’m wanderin’ around, tryin’ to find another spot. I hit up the corner of HaTzofim and HaRav Kook. There’s this cute little café, right? I think, “Hey, a coffee will fix my mood.” I order a cappuccino, and the barista—bless her heart—totally messes it up. I get a latte instead. I’m like, “Whatever, it’s caffeine.” But then, she spills it all over the counter. I’m just standin’ there, watchin’ my hopes and dreams drown in a puddle of milk. Ugh!

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