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About Haifa

Downside? Costs a bloody bomb sometimes! Nearly spat me tea out when I saw one bill – “What, am I fundin’ yer yacht?!” But when it’s good, it’s worth it, like watchin’ Kate Winslet dye her hair bonkers colours. Makes ya feel alive, mate – angry at the price, happy at the buzz, surprised at how knackered ya were ‘til them hands sorted ya out. Reckon I’d tell the lads, “Get in there, you mugs, it’s transformative!” – David Brent seal of approval, that is. “I’m erasing you, stress,” I’d mutter, channellin’ Michel Gondry’s genius. Top stuff!

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But then, BAM! A car honks, and Amir drops an orange. It rolls right into the fountain. I’m dying laughing. Amir’s face is priceless. He’s like, “I’ll get it!” But the fountain’s full of pigeons. Good luck, man!

Hundreds of dog, sheep, goat corpses openly abandoned in South