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About Jerusalem

But yo, what pisses me off? These posers chargin’ insane cash for a half-assed rub. Dr. Evil don’t play that—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars!”—I’d pay that for the real deal, not some lame tease! Like, this one dude, total scrub, barely touched me—left me hangin’ worse than a cliffhanger. I was ragin’, brah, wanted to yeet him into the Pacific! But when it’s good? Oh man, it’s *good*. Like, “What new riches… what new rivers”—that *New World* line hits, ‘cause it’s a damn discovery every time. Hands slippin’ low, breath catchin’, you’re like, “Yessss, dis is it!”

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Then, outta nowhere, my buddy Yossi shows up. He’s got this wild idea to help me out. “Let’s hit up the lumber yard on Rehov HaGolan,” he says. I’m like, “Dude, we’re in the middle of a crisis!” But he’s persistent. So we hop in his beat-up van, and off we go.

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