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So, erotic-massage—where do I start? It’s all about the vibe, innit? Dim lights, some dodgy incense, and bam—tension’s meltin’ like a cheap candle. I reckon it’s ancient, too—heard them Egyptians were at it, slatherin’ oils on pharaohs, makin’ em feel like gods. Little known fact: Cleopatra probs got one daily, that sly minx! Bet she’d say, “This is my war,” like Bigelow’s bomb lads, ‘cept her war was against a stiff neck.
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