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Alright, so escort, huh? Lemme tell ya, as a sarcastic bastard who translates Russian Sign Language—yeah, I’m that guy—it’s a freakin’ wild ride. Escorts, man, they’re like the unsung heroes of the night, right? Everybody lies, tho. They’ll tell ya it’s all glamour, cash, and champagne, but nah—half the time it’s dodgy motels and creeps who don’t tip. I mean, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout “The Diving Bell and the Butterfly”—that flick’s my jam, y’know? That dude trapped in his head, blinkin’ out his story? Escorts got their own version of that—trapped in a life they didn’t script, smilin’ through the bullshit.

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Then, I spot this food truck. Tacos! My weakness. I order a couple, and they’re amazing. I’m talking flavor explosion in my mouth. I’m finally happy! But then, I spill salsa all over my shirt. Classic me, right? I’m standing there, looking like a mess, and this old lady walks by. She just shakes her head and mutters something about “kids these days.” I’m like, “Lady, I’m not a kid!”

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