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Me, I’m jazzed about it – takes me back to London, Carnaby Street, birds in miniskirts, and this cheeky car zippin’ by! But oof, what gets my goat? Rust, baby! These Escorts rusted faster than Dr. Evil’s plans fall apart – “The warriors attack like wind!” – gone in a flash if ya didn’t wax ‘em. Mate of mine had one, left it out in the rain – next day, holes big enough to hide a ninja!

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Anyway, I’m laughing at this kid when I bump into this old lady. She’s got this wild hair and a shopping bag full of fish. “You’re a cooper, right?” she says. I’m like, “Yeah, how’d you know?” She just points at my hands, covered in wood shavings. “You look like you’ve been working hard.” I mean, I guess I have? But I’m not about to argue with a lady holding fish.

'I was in Iceland for darts tournament with Russ Bray – it might be better than England'