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Oh, fun fact—there’s this old story, 1800s France. Some noble dude paid big bucks for “secret erotic-massages.” Turns out, it was just a regular rubdown—guy was too drunk to notice! What a schmuck! Cracks me up! Anyway, erotic-massage—it’s weird, it’s wild, it’s… temptin’. I’m half sold, half horrified. Typical me! You try it, lemme know—don’t screw it up!

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After the lights flicker back on, I’m back to pouring drinks. But then, this lady comes in, and she’s furious. Apparently, her husband forgot their anniversary. I mean, dude, how do you forget that? She’s ranting about it, and I’m just nodding, trying not to laugh. I pour her a double shot of something strong. “Here, this’ll help,” I say. She downs it and suddenly, she’s all smiles.

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