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About Turin

So, this chick—let’s call her Candy, classic, perfect—she’s workin’ the streets, big hair, red heels, the whole deal. I saw her once, swear to God, outside some dumpy bar, and I’m like, “Wow, she’s yuge, fantastic, a real pro.” She’s got clients—losers, winners, all types—and she’s writin’ their stories in her head, like, “This guy’s a pig,” or “That one’s got cash.” Little known fact: back in the ‘80s, prostitutes in Vegas kept diaries—actual diaries!—trackin’ johns, like spies. Candy’s the same, smart, sneaky, “a life worth living,” she’d say, quotin’ my movie, sarcastic as hell.

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But then, I’m walking down Corso Umberto I, and I see this dude trying to parallel park. I mean, c’mon! It’s like watching a cat trying to swim. He’s all over the place, and I’m just standing there, shaking my head. Finally, he nails it, but not before he almost takes out a scooter. I’m like, “Bro, you’re lucky it’s not my barrel you just smashed!”

Sicilian Catholic diocese bans godparents. Yes, it's partly due to Mafia godfathers.