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Had this one time, right, masseuse goes too hard— oof, nearly snapped me pecs! Pissed me off, but then— whoa, relaxation hit. Surprised me, like, “What is this sorcery?” Makes ya wonder, ya know? Ever tried it? Gets ya heart racin’, then chill— pure magic! I’m tellin’ ya, it’s no wussy backrub— it’s hardcore!

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Speaking of gelato, I had to get some. I mean, it’s a must, right? So, I head over to Gelateria Alzano. I order a scoop of pistachio, my fave. But the guy behind the counter? Total grump. He’s like, “You want that in a cup or cone?” I’m like, “Dude, it’s gelato. Just give me the good stuff!” Finally, I get my cone, and it’s melting all over my hand. Classic.

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