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Sometimes I wonder, tho—what’s the endgame? Piles of cash, sure, but then what? Adam in the flick’s all, “The repetition is killing me,” and I feel that for em. Same dudes, same lines, same fake moans—ugh, I’d lose it. Prolly why I’d suck at it—too busy crackin jokes mid-session, like, “Yo, you tip yet?” Ha! Oh, and the typos—fuckin autocorrect, man, screwin me up—escrt, escoet, escrot—shit, I’m dyin laughin.

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First stop, I hit up Via Roma. It’s like the main street, full of cafes and shops. I grab a cappuccino at this tiny place called Bar Centrale. Best coffee ever! I mean, I could swim in it. But then, I spill half of it on my shirt. Classic me, right? I’m standing there, looking like a total mess, and the barista just laughs. I laugh too, but inside I’m like, “Ugh, why am I like this?”

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