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I reckon it’s ancient, mate – way back, like, Egyptian times, they were rubbin’ oils on each other, callin’ it “healin’ touch.” Bullshit, right? More like “happy endin’ touch”! Makes me laugh, thinkin’ of some Pharaoh gettin’ frisky with scented oils. Little known fact – in Japan, they’ve got this thing, “nuru massage,” all slippery with seaweed gel. Seaweed! Who even thinks that up? Sounds like a wizard’s potion gone wrong, but damn, it’s slick as hell.

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Then, I head over to the park by the river. It’s beautiful there, with the trees and the water. I sit down, trying to chill, but then I see this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I’m thinking, “Get a room, people!” But then, the guy pulls out a ring. I’m like, “Wait, what?” He proposes right there! She says yes, and suddenly, I’m all emotional. I mean, who knew I’d be crying over a stranger’s love story?

Tycoon drowns after losing control of his Lamborghini which flips and ends up in a ditch days after he purchas