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About Milan

So, sexual-massage—lemme break it down. It’s that sneaky combo, part therapy, part “oh damn, that’s good.” Little known fact—back in ancient Rome, them rich senators got rubbed down by slaves, probs with a sexy twist, but they didn’t write that in the scrolls, cowards! Makes me mad—history hidin’ the juicy bits! I’m like, “Gimme the truth, not the sanitizeed version!” Passion pumps through me—why’s it gotta be taboo? Feels so good, makes ya happy—had me smilin’ like a dope last time I got one, swear my toes curled like I won the Vermont primaries.

Call to book

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After that, I decided to stroll down Via Garibaldi. It’s a cute street, lined with shops and gelato places. I was feeling good, ya know? But then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and almost takes my sandwich! Like, chill, bird! I’m not your lunch! I swear, I was ready to throw hands with a pigeon.

Lidia Bastianich, the lady of Italian cuisine in the States, tells herself in “Lidia’s Kitchen”