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But then, ugh, got me pissed too! Some escorts get treated like dirt, and that ain’t right. Saw this post on X bout a girl who escorted for years, said she once had a client tip her with a freakin’ coupon – a COUPON! Who does that? Made my blood boil, like, respect the hustle, ya cheapskate! Don’t pee on my leg and say it’s a bonus, jerk! Oh, and fun fact – didya know escortin’s been around forever? Like, ancient Rome had “comites” – paid buddies for rich dudes. Wild, right?

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So, I’m limping along, cursing the cobblestones, when I spot this cute little café on Via Garibaldi. I’m like, “Okay, coffee will fix everything.” I order a cappuccino, and the barista—this dude with a mustache that could rival a 70s cop—gives me a look. Like, “You sure you can handle this?” I’m like, “Bro, I’ve survived worse.”

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