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About Palermo

Aight, listen up, you little bastards! I’m Eric Cartman, Visitin’ Professor, and I’m here to tell ya ‘bout sexual-massage, so respect my authoritah! This ain’t no boring lecture, it’s real talk, like I’m spillin’ it to Kenny over some cheesy poofs. Sexual-massage? It’s hands-on, dirty, and damn good if done right. Ain’t just rubbin’ backs, it’s all ‘bout that sensual vibe—gets ya goin’, ya know? I saw this flick, *Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter…and Spring*, Kim Ki-duk, 2003—my fave, bitches—and it’s all ‘bout cycles, lust, and calm shit. Like, “What you hold, you lose,” that’s some deep massage truth right there! Hold too tight, you ruin the vibe.

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BDSM · Striptease · Full Body Sensual Massage · Kissing if good chemistry · Cunnilingus · Facesitting (give) for extra charge · Tantric massage · Handjob.

After that chaos, I head to the market on Via della Repubblica. Fresh produce, right? I’m all about that. I grab some tomatoes, and this old lady starts chatting me up. She’s like, “You know, these tomatoes are the best in town!” I’m thinking, “Lady, I just want to pay and go.” But she’s relentless. I’m nodding, pretending to care.

Sassari still without water: disruptions expected for Tuesday 18 March