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About Bologna

So, I’m thinkin’, what’s the deal with it? Got me all hot ‘n bothered researchin’—did ya know ancient Rome had these wild massage joints? Rich dudes gettin’ oiled up by pros, no shame, just livin’. Blows my mind! Makes me wanna yell, “Where’s my toga, dammit?!” Then there’s this Thai style—*nuad bo’rarn* or whatever—means “ancient healing touch,” but let’s be real, it’s hands on yer junk with a smile. Sneaky devils, I’m jealous! Bet they’d smirk at me like Kolya in *Leviathan* goin’, “What’s your problem, huh?”

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Then, bam! Outta nowhere, I trip over a cobblestone. Like, seriously? Who thought it was a good idea to make streets like that? I’m cursing under my breath, but then I see this old lady chuckling at me. I laugh it off, but inside, I’m like, “You think that’s funny, huh?”

Semi-truck cab crashes off Highway 99 near Lodi