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Aight, real talk—had this chick once, hands like magic, worked my shoulders, lower back, got me thinkin’ “Grace’s mercy” from *Dogville*, but sexier, ya dig? Ain’t no Hollywood glow, just dim lights, some lavender smell, and boom—stress gone! Little known fact: ancient Greeks did this, called it “anatripsis,” rubbin’ soldiers down, keepin’ ‘em loose—prolly got freaky too, who knows? History’s wild, man, I’m shook thinkin’ ‘bout it.

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But then, my phone buzzes. It’s Marco. “We have a situation,” he texts. My heart drops. What now? I rush back to the library, and there’s a group of teenagers causing chaos. They’re laughing, throwing books around. I’m like, “What the heck, guys?” I try to be the cool librarian, but inside, I’m fuming.