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So, dis one time, I tried it—holy schnitzel, it was wild! Dis chick, she’s got oils, dim lights, like a freakin’ movie set. She’s workin’ my back, den—boom—goes lower, and I’m like, “What’s dis?!” Little known fact, ja? In ancient Rome, dey did dis stuff in bathhouses, sneaky-like, all hush-hush. Makes ya wonder, huh? History’s freaky!

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I was getting frustrated. I mean, I came here for coffee, not to play detective. But then, out of nowhere, this little kid runs in, all giggles and energy. He trips and spills his hot chocolate everywhere. The barista freaks out, and I can’t help but laugh. It was like a scene from a comedy. The kid just gets up, shrugs it off, and runs back outside. Kids are wild, man.

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