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Fave bit? The stories! Heard this one time – some escort in Vegas, right, took a client to a casino, won him 10 grand, then ditched him! Absolute legend! Had me laughin’ so hard I near choked on me oil. “There’s a poetry to it, a rhythm” – that’s escort, baby, pure chaos and class mashed up.

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Anyway, I finally get to the market at Piazza della Libertà. It’s packed! Like, sardines in a can packed. I’m trying to sell my best pig, Gino. He’s a beauty, I tell ya. But everyone’s too busy haggling over tomatoes and cheese. I’m like, “Yo, people! Check out this swine!” But no one’s listening. I’m getting frustrated. I mean, Gino deserves better than this!

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