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About Rome

Ruh-roh! Me, a tractor driver, huh? So, findin’ a prostitute—wild stuff, man! Drivin’ my rusty ol’ rig, chuggin’ thru fields, I see things. Like, ya know, "This is our city," from that flick *Only Lovers Left Alive*. Dark vibes, right? Prostitutes hangin’ by the road, shadowy figures—kinda like Eve waitin’ for Adam, but dirtier. I’m thinkin’, “Man, these girls got stories!” One time, saw this chick, legs for days, leanin’ on a busted fence. Felt bad, ya know? Life’s tough out there.

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But then, just when I think it can’t get crazier, a seagull flies in through the door! I’m not even kidding! It swoops down, grabs a bag of chips off the counter, and bolts. I’m standing there, mouth agape, while everyone’s laughing. I’m like, “Great, now we’re feeding the wildlife.”

I've lived in Italy my entire life. There's one gorgeous gem on the Coast of the Gods that I always recommend to tourists.