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So, check this—erotic-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs, nah. It’s this ancient thing, goes way back to like, Tantra in India, 5000 years ago—crazy, right? Monks were all “peace, love, and sexy vibes,” but sneaky-like. Bet they didn’t tell the tourists that! Makes me happy thinkin’ some guru was gettin’ freaky with oils while chantin’. Ha! Imagine that—saffron robes and a sly wink. How you doin’ after that mental pic?

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But then, outta nowhere, I see this huge net tangled up in some rocks. I’m like, “No way!” I swim over, and it’s a mess. I’m trying to untangle it, but it’s like wrestling an octopus. I’m getting frustrated, and I’m thinking, “Why do people do this? Just throw your trash in the bin, people!”

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