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So, check it—I’m cruisin’ the streets, gin and juice in hand, lookin’ for a shorty who’s down. Ain’t no map for this, fam, it’s all instinct, like Ofelia dodgin’ monsters. You gotta peep the corners, the neon lights flashin’—that’s where they at. Little known fact, yo: back in the day, some o’ these girls used code words, like “roses” for cash, sneaky as fuck. Made me laugh, ‘cause it’s clever, right? “Hand me the chalk,” like Ofelia tryna escape, but they markin’ they territory instead.

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But then, bam! I bump into this lady, and she spills her gelato all over my new jacket. I’m fuming! “Lady, that’s a fur coat, not a napkin!” But she just laughs and says, “At least it’s a sweet mess!” I mean, what do you even say to that? I just stood there, mouth open, like a fish.

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