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About Portmore

Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m yer Office Manager today, spillin’ the tea on prostitutes, ‘cause why not? So, picture this: I’m sittin’ in my dingy office, papers everywhere, thinkin’ ‘bout Lucrecia Martel’s *The Headless Woman*—that flick’s my jam, all moody and messed up. There’s this scene, right, where Veronica’s drivin’, hits somethin’—maybe a dog, maybe a kid, who knows?—and she just keeps goin’, dazed, lost in her head. That’s how I see prostitutes sometimes, y’know? Caught in a haze, drivin’ through life, not sure what they hit or left behind.

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Then, I overhear this couple at the next table. They’re talkin’ about some beach party at James Bond Beach. I’m like, “Wait, what?!” I love a good beach party! But I can’t go. Gotta finish this work. Ugh.

$60M sewer funding, balloon ban on busy Falmouth town meeting agenda