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But here’s the thing—*Talk to Her* vibes hit me hard. That line, “The best thing is to wait,” pops up, and I’m like, wait for what? Love? A discount? I’m pacin’, neurotic as hell, thinkin’—is this moral? Immoral? Who cares! I’m not hurtin’ nobody, right? Still, my brain’s yellin’, “Larry, you idiot, don’t do it!” But then—surprise, surprise—I’m curious. What’s she like? Does she talk? Does she laugh at my dumb jokes? I’d probably overthink it, ruin the whole thing. “So, uh, ya like Seinfeld?” Crickets.

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Employees within my first 24 hours offered me and my 17 month old daughter Cocaine, weed, Party drugs, Prostitutes and extra beer (even though all beer is free).

Then, outta nowhere, my buddy Jamal shows up. He’s always got some crazy story. Today, he tells me he saw a goat on the road by the Lucea Bay. A goat! Just chillin’ like it owns the place. I’m laughin’ so hard, I almost drop my wrench. Like, who lets their goat roam free? Only in Lucea, man.

Lucea’s deputy mayor calls for Noel Holmes Hospital upgrade