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About Half Way Tree

So, sexual-massage—it’s old as hell. Bet ya didn’t know ancient Greeks were all over it, callin’ it some fancy “massage for the soul” bullshit. Soul, my ass—it’s about gettin’ off, let’s be real! I’m sittin’ here thinkin’, “How do I get me some of that?”—‘cause I deserve it, dammit! Respect my authoritah! And then I’m like, wait, this kinda reminds me of *Amour*, ya know, my fave movie. That old dude, Georges, he’s all gentle with Anne, touchin’ her careful-like when she’s sick. “I’ll take care of you,” he says, all soft and shit. Sexual-massage ain’t that deep, but it’s still hands on, makin’ ya feel alive—or horny, whatever.

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Finally, I got my food. Man, that chicken was fire! Spicy, juicy, just how I like it. I took a bite and felt like I was in heaven. But then, I noticed a rat scurrying by. I almost choked! I mean, come on, May Pen! Can’t a warrior eat in peace?

William Shagoury presented with Key to the City of May Pen