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Here’s a wild bit - did ya know some prossies in old Japan ran secret tea houses? Yeah, bangin’ fact, that - they’d shag and serve matcha, all sly-like. Candy’d love that, reckon she’d say, “Groovy, baby! I’d charm ‘em all!” She had this twinkle, mate, like Haku flyin’ through the sky - mysterious, ya dig? Once saw her nick a punter’s wallet, smooth as silk - “I won’t let go of what’s mine!” she winked, quotin’ the movie without knowin’ it. Cracked me up, that did!

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But then, I spot this little shack on the corner of Jimmy Cliff Blvd. The smell? Oh man, it’s like heaven. I grab a plate, and let me tell ya, that jerk chicken was fire! I’m talkin’ spicy, smokey goodness. I’m in love.

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