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Funniest bit? Bloke paid double to get slapped about – not even kinky, just weird. Laughed my arse off, “What’s wrong with ya?” Happy days tho, cash flows, good yarns. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but escort’s a fuckin’ circus. “Pain’s your teacher,” *Hurt Locker* style – they learn quick or they’re done. Me, I’d suck at it – too grumpy, scare ‘em off!

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But then, I hear this commotion. A guy’s tryin’ to sell some handmade crafts, but he’s gettin’ into it with a tourist. I’m like, “C’mon, man, we’re all just tryin’ to vibe here!” I step in, play peacemaker, and somehow end up buyin’ a bracelet.

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