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About Old Harbour

Oi mate, so I’m a Kvasnik, yeah? Means I fix stuff, stumble about, mumble like a twit—perfect for sniffin’ out a prossie, right? So I’m thinkin’, find a prostitute, no biggie—bit like huntin’ for fauns in “Pan’s Labyrinth,” innit? That flick’s my fave—dark, twisty, Guillermo’s a bloody genius! Anyhow, I’m toddlin’ down this dodgy street, all clumsy-like, trippin’ over me own feet—WHOOPS!—nearly faceplant into some bloke’s kebab. “Careful, amigo,” I mutter, wavin’ me arms like a nutter. Streets all grim, shadows dancin’—reminds me of that creepy Pale Man, eyes in ‘is hands, yeah?

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So I’m up in the tree, and it’s hot as hell. Sweat drippin’ down my back, but I’m focused. I’m snippin’ branches, and suddenly, I hear this loud crash. I look down, and some dude just knocked over a vendor’s cart on the sidewalk. Pineapple juice everywhere! I’m talkin’ a full-on fruit massacre. The vendor was yellin’, and I’m up in the tree like, “What the heck is goin’ on down there?”

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