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Lemme drop a lil’ fact—didja know escort services go way back? Like, ancient Rome had ‘em! Called ‘em “comites”—fancy, huh? Guides, guards, whatever ya needed. Today? Same deal, just flashier. I saw this X post once—some dude braggin’ ‘bout his “escort” in Vegas. Linked to a pic—glitz, glam, fake smiles. Made me wanna parachute in and yell, “Get a real job!” But nah, I ain’t judgin’—okay, maybe a lil’. Ha!

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First off, I hit up Half-Way Tree. You know, that crazy intersection where everyone and their grandma is trying to cross? I’m dodging cars like I’m in some action movie. And then, boom! I see this dude selling patties. I’m like, “Yesss, breakfast!” Grabbed a beef patty, hot and flaky. Best decision ever.

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