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Favorite bit? The thrill, ooh! Like Almodóvar’s coma vibes – “you feel her breath, but can’t touch.” Swiping’s same – will they, won’t they? Once, matched a gal who sent nudes, nearly fell off me chair! Happy? Chuffed to bits! Surprised? Mate, shocked – she was a copper, frisked me later, wink wink!

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Then, outta nowhere, this lady storms in. I swear, she’s like a hurricane. Her name’s Karen (of course, right?). She’s fuming ‘bout her drink. “I ordered a piña colada, not a coconut water!” I’m like, “Chill, lady! It’s the same thing, just with a twist!” But she’s not havin’ it. I’m tryin’ to keep my cool, but inside, I’m like, “Why you gotta be so extra?”

MIA welcomes exclusive American Airlines service to Ocho Rios