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About Montego Bay

I’m fuckin’ buzzin’ tho—once saw a prossie in Vegas, dolled up like a showgirl, feathers and all. Thought, “Bloody hell, she’s got more style than half these wankers!” Surprised me, yeah—didn’t expect class in that game. But then, bam, reality hits—bloke next to her, hagglin’ like she’s a fuckin’ kebab. Pissed me right off! “You’re a disgrace, you soggy twat!”—that’s what I’d scream, Gordon-style.

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After that, I decided to take a stroll down Fisherman’s Wharf. The view is insane! The ocean, the boats, the whole vibe. I was feeling good again. But then, outta nowhere, a seagull swooped down and stole my sandwich! Like, really? I was just standing there, mouth agape, watching my lunch fly away. I yelled, “Hey! That’s mine!” But the bird didn’t care. It was like, “Sorry, dude, I’m hungry too.”

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