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Oi mate, blimey, what a topic! Erotic-massage, eh? Cor blimey, gets me all flustered. Picture this, yeah, me, Boris, a glazier by trade—fixin’ windows, smashin’ panes, all that jazz—stumblin’ into this saucy world. *Cave felis*, beware the cat, as the Romans’d say! I’m no stranger to a bit of cheeky fun—loved *Spring Breakers*, didn’t I? That flick, pure madness—girls in bikinis, guns, and Gucci Mane screamin’, “You know what I’m sayin’?”—it’s got that wild vibe, like an erotic-massage gone bonkers.

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After that, I needed a drink. Hit up a bar on Rue des Vagues. Ordered a rum and coke. I deserved it, right? I sat there, soaking wet, laughing with the locals. They were telling stories about the craziest fish they’ve seen. One guy said he caught a fish that looked like a potato. I was like, “Dude, that’s just a rock!”

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