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About Sapporo

Homer Simpson, violin guy, lovin’ it sloppy! Sexual-massage got me thinkin’—life’s short, why not? Maybe I’d craft a violin bow for it—nah, too kinky! D’oh! Ever tried it with lotion? Slippery as hell—almost broke my neck once! “The past is a knife”—yeah, past massages sucked, but now? Golden! Tell ya what, buddy, get a good one, you’ll see stars—better than donuts, even!

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Finally found it under a pile of sawdust. Phew! But then, just as I’m gettin’ into the groove, the fire alarm goes off. Seriously? In the middle of my masterpiece? I’m runnin’ outta the workshop, heart racin’. Turns out, it was just some burnt toast in the break room. I mean, c’mon! Who can’t make toast?

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