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Once knew a fella, Jimmy, swore he found the “perfect” gal for hire – cheap, quick, no fuss. Bragged like he won the lotto. Two days later? Cops nabbed him, sting op! I laughed my ass off – “How’s that workin for ya, genius?” Karma’s a bitch, ain’t it? Prostitution’s tricky – legal some spots, like Nevada, but sneaky as hell elsewhere. Fun fact: Amsterdam’s got them window girls, lit up red, like a dang WALL-E hoverchair showroom! Wild, right?

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But then, guess what? My phone buzzed. It was my mom. She was like, “When are you coming home?” I was like, “Mom, I’m busy living my best life in Biratori!” She didn’t get it, of course. Classic mom.

Japan's indigenous people eye political power