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Oi, precious, me’s Gollum, yesss, split-mind hissing! Sex-dating, eh? Nasty, tricksy thing it is! Swiping left, right, like chasing shadows. Me likes it, me hates it—arghh! Reminds me of *The Great Beauty*, y’know? “What’s beyond is a lie,” Jep says. Sex-dating’s like that—shiny, empty promises. Profiles all dolled up, pics fake as hobbits’ gold! Met this lass once, said she’s 25—lies! More like 40, wrinkles deep as Mordor’s pits. Made me mad, precious, mad as a warg!

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Club Piaa, 1 Chome Nakasu, Hakata Ward, Fukuoka, Fukuoka Prefecture, Japan Brothels Itazura Bunny 9,km away.

So, I wrap up the day, head back to the park, and grab a beer with Kenji. We’re laughing about the craziness. Fukuecho, man. It’s wild, it’s beautiful, and it’s home. I wouldn’t trade it for anything.