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So, I’m picturin’ it—some fancy spa, dim lights, maybe a dude named Chad with magic fingers. Not creepy, tho! It’s all classy, like, “This is not an ordinary massage, folks!” I read once—get this—ancient Romans did this stuff! They’d rub each other down after battles, all sensual-like. Bet they didn’t use mayo, tho—haha, gross! But srsly, it’s wild how it’s been around forever. Makes me happy thinkin’ people been chillin’ like that for centuries.

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Then, I got a call from my next client, Ms. Sato. She’s a real piece of work. Always changing her mind. She wanted to meet at the Himeji City Museum of Art. I thought, “Great, let’s mix business with culture.” But when I got there, she was nowhere to be found. I waited for like 30 minutes, pacing around the museum, looking like a lost puppy.

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