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Oh, and the laughs? Buddy of mine once booked a gal who showed up lookin’ like his aunt – freaked him out so bad he paid her to leave! Hah! Escort’s a crapshoot, man. Ya never know. “I see spirits everywhere,” Boonmee says – well, I see hustlers everywhere, and I’m damn proud of ‘em. Greed is good, keeps the world spinnin’. Now, go make some cash, ya lazy bastard!

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After that, I head to the market on Kamogata Street. Man, the smells! Fresh fish, grilled yakitori, and don’t even get me started on the sweet smell of mochi. I’m drooling, right? I grab some grilled fish, and this old lady behind the counter is like, “You want some wasabi with that?” I’m like, “Sure, why not?” Big mistake. I take a bite, and my eyes are watering like a fountain. I’m gasping for air, and she’s just cackling. I swear, she’s got a wicked sense of humor.