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Oh, and the jargon—mate, it’s all about “maximizin’ relaxation outputs,” ain’t it? Key performance indicators: how many “oohs” ya get per minute! Proper chuckles, that. Tell ya what, next time you’re gettin’ one, lean in and whisper, “We’re goin’ to the red zone,” like Jessica Chastain huntin’ terrorists. Gets a laugh—or a slap, dependin’ on the mood!

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After that, I head to the famous Kurume Ramen street. I’m starving! I order a bowl, and it’s like heaven in a bowl. Seriously, the broth is so rich, I could swim in it. I’m slurping away, and this old lady next to me starts chatting. She’s telling me about the history of Kurume, how it’s famous for its textiles and all that jazz. I’m nodding, but all I can think is, “Lady, I just want to finish my ramen!”

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