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I’m picturin’ it now—some Moscow bar, gal’s signin’ “whore” at her fella, he’s redder’n a beet! Makes me happy, seein’ folks get real. Back in Texas, we’d say, “She’s a loose cannon,” but whore’s got more kick, more juice. Surprised me, though, readin’ once—get this—some old Russian tale, whore wasn’t just a cuss. Nope, meant a gal who tricked taxmen, hid vodka in her skirts! Ain’t that a hoot? History’s wilder’n a rodeo.

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After that, I head to the waterfront. The view of the Kanmon Bridge is sick! I mean, it’s iconic. I snap a pic for the ‘gram. Gotta show off, right? But then, I see this group of tourists trying to take a selfie. They’re all crowded, and one dude’s holding a giant fish. I’m like, “Bro, that’s not how you do it!” But hey, who am I to judge?

1 dead, 2 injured in partial collapse of warehouse in west Japan