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Alright, listen up, ya filthy minion! I’m Dr. Evil—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars!”—and I’m gonna spill the tea on prostitutes, ‘cause why not? So, picture this: a chick workin’ the streets, right? Kinda like in *Moonrise Kingdom*, where Sam and Suzy run off, all wild and free, chasin’ somethin’ bigger. Except this gal’s chasin’ cash, not some twee romance in the woods. “We’re in love,” Suzy says in the flick, but this prostitute? She’s in love with survival, baby!

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After that, I was feeling kinda adventurous, so I decided to check out the Urakawa Museum. I thought it’d be boring, but it was actually super interesting. They had this exhibit on the local dialects. As a linguist, I was totally nerding out. I mean, who knew Urakawa had its own slang? I was jotting down notes like a madman. But then, I overheard this old guy talking about how the younger generation doesn’t use the dialect anymore. I felt a pang of sadness. Like, c’mon, keep the culture alive, people!

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