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Best bit? The thrill, fam! That rush when you match someone hot—heart’s racin’, pants tightenin’. Surprised me how addictive it gets, like chasin’ a high. Dr. Evil—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars”—I’d pay that to bottle that feelin’. Worst part? Ghostin’. Swear, I’ve been left on read more times than a spam email. Pisses me off—grow some balls, say “nah,” right?

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After the power comes back, I finish my meal and head out. I’m feeling good, right? But then I see a bunch of kids playing soccer on the street. They’re having a blast, but one of them kicks the ball right at me. I dodge it like a ninja, but then I trip over my own feet. Classic me. Everyone laughs, and I’m like, “Yeah, I meant to do that!”

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